"Well of course, I have a great idea, lett us emphasise the great value of our teachings and how this pearl of great price is provided without cost. But is it free? Noooo. Without cost does not mean free. But we can provide the money. Yes we will lend every publisher £15 trillion and all they have to do is pay it back in regular installments with minimal interest.
Some people actually question whether we care for our fellow domestics. Of course we care because we want them to benefit from this generous loan which will pay for a very rewarding education."
Nod nod, smile smile, gurn gurn.
Hand rub.